Jesus: The Friend of Sinners
One of the most striking titles given to Jesus was “the friend of sinners” (Matthew 11:19; Luke 7:34). He didn’t just preach to crowds, He ate at tables, walked roads, and shared life with those far from God. His friendships were genuine, costly and transformative.
Yet when we look at the church today, the picture is often very different. Many followers of Jesus have few friends who are “sinners”.
Research shows this is not a small issue:
- In the USA, 38% of practising Christians have no non-Christian friends at all. Of those who do, many of the relationships are limited or superficial (Barna Group).
- In the UK, nearly half—47%—of practising Christians have no non-Christian friends. Again, those who do often struggle to move beyond surface-level connections (Talking Jesus Report).
- Looking at Australia more closely, the 2021 Australian Community Survey found that while 44% of Australians have a close friend or family member who goes to church, 56% do not. In other words, for over half of the population, Christians are absent from their inner circles (NCLS Research).
These numbers matter. They reveal a gap between the example of Jesus and the lived reality of many Christians today. If we have no meaningful friendships with those outside the church, how can we embody the presence of Jesus in their lives?
A Friendly Church vs. Making Friends in Church
There’s a crucial difference between being friendly and being a friend. Churches can be full of friendly people—welcoming smiles, polite conversations, handshakes at the door. Those things matter, but they don’t keep people connected. People may come back because a church feels friendly, but they stay because they’ve made friends.
Friendship goes beyond a greeting. A friend listens when life is heavy and celebrates when joy arrives. A friend doesn’t just welcome you into the sanctuary—they welcome you into their home.
If Jesus chose to befriend those called “sinners” by the religious elite, then the challenge is not merely to invite people to our events, but to invite them into our lives.
The statistics are sobering, but they’re also an invitation. An invitation to look beyond the comfortable circle, to step across the divide, to build friendships beyond the walls of the church.
Because while the Gospel may be proclaimed in a sermon, it’s demonstrated through acts of kinds and the gift of genuine friendship.
